Morning time

I must admit, since I've been working at home, it has been hard for
me to just get up at the crack of dawn to see everyone off.
Lately I have been missing that time with my family, and my morning time
with God.  With HIM, it's been rushed as I have to catch up on
my work due to the time I've slept in.

SO ... the other night I asked God if he would start waking me at a good time
each morning so that I can change my habit, alarms I can turn off, but God
has this way of waking me , that I just love.
Yesterday, and again today, he woke me.  I didn't hesitate one second, I got
out of the warmth of the covers, got dressed, made coffee, made breakfast
for the girls, kissed my husband goodbye, and then when they all left, it was just
me, God, and a good cup of coffee.

I started off just praying, you know the prayer..... Dear Lord, thank you for this day..
etc.  Today however was different. Today, I pulled up a chair at my desk, and
spoke a few words to the Lord, and then let him minister to my heart.
It was an awesome conversation!  His presence was there surrounding me.
I cried over one of my kids, one traveling a hard road, and God spoke to me about her,
His love for her, and that even though she is making some wrong choices He knows her
heart and the love she has for him despite her actions, just as I know that she loves me
despite her going against me at times.  She is searching, just as I had done at one time,
and like me , God will love her back to Him, pick her up, clean her off, and hold her till
she heals, and till she knows that HE ALONE is all she needs.
He also likes Kleenex, he joked with me about it as I was using it.
He gave me an idea for an add for them, so I think I'm going to pitch it to them.
He really does care about you. He wants to converse with you, to hold you,
to make you laugh,  pick you up and show you his view of things, to heal you
from deep hurts, some that you may have forgotten.

So my chanllenge to you today is to find a few minutes to have alone with the Lord,
and let him do most the talking.  I think you will find that His word will come to you,
that He already knows what it is that you need, and let his love for you flow over
you, encompass you , until you feel held.

Praying for you always,
Kim

Cooking and family

Here I sit watching Julie & Julia with Paige and Meagan,
while we are waiting on a Mexican style hash to finish cooking.
This last year we have been teaching the girls how to cook some
family favorites.
It has been fun.
Isn't it wonderful to think of how food & family just go together.
I think that is what is so special about this time of year, it turns
cold and automatically I'm thinking of cooking , and filling the
house with wonderful aromas!

Think of your favorite holiday recipe, and let's share them on here!
I will also post them on facebook.  SO make sure it's not a secret
recipe!

Going to stir the pot.... I'll be back tomorrow with a recipe !!

Having faith while the pain is there

It's been a little over 2 weeks now that I got my sudden onset of pain just under the right ribcage.
A day in the ER , xrays, and sonagram and all they can tell me is it's a fatty liver.
Followed up after a painfilled weekend with the specialist.
For some reason, fear crept in, and I started preparing myself for the worst.
I broke down right before he came in.
Surely something that hurts this long, and this bad has to be horrific.
He calmed me down, and told me all my blood test, and urnine test come back great.
It's a fatty liver as far as he can tell.
It can go away with exercise, and eating well.
Great! But what about this pain???????
I had prayed for healing, and even got confirmation, and yet doubt kept creeping.
Just because the pain is here, doesn't mean that God hasn't already healed me.
It could be that I have to go through the process of healing.
So, I'm eating right, mostly organic. 
The pain... still there, and more severe since Wednesday, and today almost unbearable.
I thought about what Kathleen has said about going through the pain, but still holding on
and being held by the Lord.  Pain, is pain, and well, God is God.. and so I took Kathleen's
role model example, and through the pain , I am holding fast to the promises of God.
I know that I know, He is more than able. He is with me always. He works all things
out for my good.

What pain are you in today?  Give it over to God, allow Him to bring you through it, and
hold fast to him, as he holds on to you. You are his precious child. He loves you.
He is faithful. Profess His Promises. Lay hold and do not let go of Him.
"I have set the LORD always before me. Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken." (Psalm 16:8, NIV)
"He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." (Isaiah 40:29-31, NIV)

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

~ Romans 8:28, NLT

Thes was to fulfill what was spoken through the prophet Isaiah: "He took up our infirmities
and carried our diseases." Matthew 8:17

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.   Hebrews 10:23
So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded Hebrews 10:35

MY favorite to shout out... Revelations 12:11
They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; thy did not love their lives
so much as to shrink from death. !!!!!!!!!
All we go through... our testimony... our lives are not in vain !!!  This is where I can see that we should count it all joy when we are faced with battles, they strengthen our faith, and they give us a testimony!
A testimony that will defeat Satan in due time.
WE WIN!!!!!!

Father God, you comfort those who mourn, those in pain, and you heal the broken hearted, you give strength to the weary, you uphold us by your right hand! You are the same yesterday , today and forever!
You are the lover of our souls.  You have written our name on the palm of your hand, you know the very hairs on our head, you know us better than we know ourselves.  You have called us by name, set us apart.
Let us take captive every thought that sets itself against you Lord God, and let us proclaim your word, your promises over our lives. Help us to seize hold of the truth, with all faith , hold fast to your ways. Knowing full well that you work all things out for our good, for your glory!
You are the all knowing father. I praise you Lord. I choose to believe YOU!
In Jesus Name - AMEN

my daughter

I'm new at the empty nest thing, well almost empty nest.
I have 5 children.
Paige the oldest was already living on her own when her dad and I got married.
I never had the chance to raise her, but I adore watching her grow in the Lord.
John, the only son, is now in the Army in Washington. I haven't seen him since
March. I sure miss him.
Jennifer moved out at 17.  I sure miss her.
Meagan and Haley are still here. I am trying to soak in every minute I can with them.

Jennifer was in my dream this morning. She was seeking counsel from a woman
I do not know, and myself, about her divorce, and her new plan for her life.
She had bleached her hair, and had this cute Marilyn Monroe  hair cut.
I remember thinking, she's so cute, she's always been beautiful.
As she told us of her plans to move to New York, she seemed so excited, but
something just didn't hit me right.
When I asked her why she was moving so far from home, and why she wasn't
pursuing her dreams of being a nurse, she got quiet and started to tear up,
 I don't know where I belong, I'm not good enough, I've messed up."
With that she lept from the bed into my arms, and she was so light,
just like when she was little, and she wrapped her arms and legs around me,
and there I was, holding my little girl again. It felt soo good to just hold her,
and speak into her ear how much I believe in her, and how much I love her, and
that I will help her to succeed.  I didn't want this to end.  She's been running from
me for so long, this feels soo good , this is the love and honesty I've missed from her.

I woke up.. sad because I never want her to feel that way, happy because I got
to hold the daughter I once held, and she WANTED to be held, and it was soo nice.

I think God feels that way when we've gone off on our own path, we stumble,
fall, and sometimes mess everything up, and yet we are deteremined to stand and
make it better the best we know how, instead of listening to the one who loves us most.
Pride gets in the way, don't let him win, don't let him know I'm hurt, I'm tough, I'll make it.
Finally at some point, we break down.. and at that point we reach out WANTING to be
held, and God our most precious Father picks us up, holds us, and speaks truth over us.
You are MY daughter, I have a plan for your life, follow me and see if I will not use you
beyond your wildest dreams, give yourself over to me, and just see.  You are Daddy's
little angel.
HE LOVES HOLDING US, and most of all he loves when we HOLD TIGHT.

Is there something in your life today that God's been dealing with you about, and you
keep trying to fix it on your own, or have you just been running your own way, and
nothing seems to work out the way you thought but pride is keeping you back from
admitting it all to HIM? 
Run and leap into HIS arms. HOLD TIGHT..allow your Father to just hold you, and
fill you up with his love for you, speaking over you, till you know who's you are.
You won't be disappointed!

Hormones, stress, or Pre-ENS?

Well yesterday was a doozy! 
As soon as I posted my blog about being a slave to your flesh, I was so
excited... and an hour later a spirit of heaviness just seemed to be on me.

I tried to shake it, sang praise songs, and even then I just burst into tears.
I later went in to cook dinner, feelin a little better, and Haley came home
and was so excited to be telling me about a college in RHODE ISLAND !!!
She would like to check it out and I was so happy for her, and then I
started thinking of her being far away, and John, my son, is far away,
my granddaughter is far away, Jennifer is far away, and soon Haley will
go too.. and I just lost it... tears just took over, and I made sure that
Haley didn't see me, because the last thing I want is for her to feel like
she shouldn't move away to pursue her dreams.
As soon as Rick came home .. he saw me, and asked what's wrong,
and I couldn't even get the words out, I just buried my head in his chest and
sobbed.  Then I told him, and of course he thinks it will be great when the
kids are gone.... and so I said.. "what I'm tellin you for.. you don't understand."
With that he hugged me, and reassured me, and even made some jokes.

I felt better after that, and we all had a great time listening to the girls day,
and some jokes were said.. and darn.. I'm gonna miss this time with them.

I got up refreshed in spirit, and ready to tackle the day.

My flesh wants to go back to sleep... but so far it hasn't won.
God is so good. I love him dearly.  I wonder if he has empty nest syndrome? lol.
Does it pain him to not have all his children there?  I think his heart longs for the
day we are all home. 
I'm homeward bound... lookin to the heavens ... for my redeemer is coming..
Who will I reach to come home with me?  I hope many.

I'm back! (and it sure feels good)

Hi !

First off, let me say how good it is to be back writing on my blog.
I don't know if I'm missed or not, but I sure know this much, it
really is such a blessing getting to share things with others, to give hope,
to inspire, to encourage, and even now again, I get to share things I might need
help on.

Well, this last Monday night was to say the least FABULOUS!  It came right in the
middle of caos in my family, and work, and it just blessed me and lifted my spirit.
I signed up for this class at our church that is on healthy eating and my dear friend Amy
is hosting this program at her home. It's all about taking whole foods, and learning a new
way of cooking so we can glorify God by taking care of our bodies.
 It's a group of ladies having some laughs, crying , singing, and learning more about ourselves,
our God, eachother, and  leaving there full of love, and food, and a touch more wiser than when
we came.

I must say the new foods were pretty tasty!  Hummus... I had Hummus, and with the whole
grain chips it was pretty good!  There were so many new grains there that I can't recall them
off hand, but I liked them!  I can't wait to try more new recipes. I also am looking forward to
making some of my comfort foods with these new items, and seeing how they will taste in place of
the processed foods I normally use.

God gave me some food for thought this morning through Joyce Meyers.  ( I LOVE her!)
It is 1Corinthians 6:12.  - You say, "I am allowed to do anything"-but not everything is good for you. And
even though "I'm allowed to do anything," I must not become a SLAVE to anything.

Paul went on to talk about food, and sex, the two things people have the most trouble controlling.
Joyce went on to say that there are many things we can do that aren't good for us, and still we will go to heaven.
 For instance I won't miss heaven for being overweight, and others won't miss heaven because they smoke , or say curse words now and again, but it sure does hinder our witness, and what ministry God has called us to do.
  If I am over eating, and my body becomes more sluggish, and I'm too tired to
get done all the things in my day because of it, then I have missed what God has called me to do for that day because I was too tired, or didn't have enough time to get to it.
Our desires, our flesh man, craves things to fulfill itself, and whatever we give it, it will crave more of.
But we are to control our flesh, not let it control us.  So we MUST set boundries for ourselves.

A young lady who has a lot of hurt in her life.  Her soul craves comfort, love, & security. 
Her flesh identifies this as a need to be filled with something that will comfort her, love her, and protect her.
She craves this sooo much, that at the first man that comes along who see's she is lonely and hurting (and intends to use her, or control her) shows her sympathy she
starts to listen , he holds her and makes her feel safe, and she starts to feel loved. She has what is called
a false hope. To her, it's hope none the less, and it feels so good to have that hope again, that she becomes blinded to what is real, and she doesn't see that she is in danger.  Sure she knows God, she prays when she needs something, and she goes to church when it's convient, or a special holiday, and hey.. she used to be really involved in church.. that counts for something right.. besides, God wouldn't let this happen if He didn't approve right?

A person who does not control their appetite is the same way. This extra serving won't be so bad.
This cake was so good, I must have another piece. It's that time of the month, and I NEED chocolate..
I'm too tired to exercise 4-5 times a week.  I got up today , I did a few chores, that's good enough right?
I skipped a meal, so that should cover it.. right? I prayed over it, God will make it good for my body.

They continue to give into how their flesh feels, what the flesh wants, and ignoring the still small voice
that is warning them of impending danger.
God is not going to come down here and live your life for you, and MAKE you live healthier, or happier.
He does however give us all the tools that will make our life here better, and happier.
We have to do what WE can do for ourselves, by placing boundries in our lives, and doing all we can on our part, and God will come in and do what we can not.
But it is up to us to take control , it's not enough to know the Word, you have to practice it.

Our flesh will only demand what it's given. If you heal pain by food, sex, alcohol, drugs, etc.. that is what your flesh will crave.
Whatever we allow our flesh to have, it will want more. 
We MUST take over our flesh , and train it in the ways of the Lord.  It does not own us.
We are not slave to it, Jesus has set us free.
Our flesh will throw a fit when we try to get rid of the things that  it desires, but it will pass, and
it will get used to new things.

I am not looking forward to the fits my body will throw when I start pushing it to exercise more, but
it will get used to it... just like it got used to 2% milk, and diet coke. 
I feel in control today, and I pray that I will remain in control tomorrow.
Each day, I want to wake up and decide to be in control of my flesh.

Father , I pray that you will help us to control our fleshly desires.  I understand that I must make
the first step, and whatever I do not have the power to do I pray for your strength to help me
push through.
Fill those empty places in our lives with you. Let our flesh cry out for more of YOU, and of the
things you have created for us, not with empty unfullfilling harmful things.
I give you my life, my flesh, my mind, and spirit.  Let me forever be hungry for more of you.
In Jesus Name-Amen

It's good for us!

I just got back from walking with Rick and Paige.  Ugghhhh.. this whole outta shape thing
is horrible!  I bet if I were any less active it wouldn't be long before my muscles just up and
give out on me.
I feel so ashamed that I have let myself get this bad.  Enough of that though, I can't dwell on
what I've done to myself. Now I all I can do is pray for God's strength to help me correct
what I can, and pray he will correct what I can't.

My walk with the Lord through my life has seen similar side effects. 
When I was younger my mom and I prayed together quite often.  She really could
make the devil shake when she prayed, and I learned to pray the same way, and in
my young innocent heart, with all I had in me, I just believed God would do whatever
I asked of Him.
As the years went on, and my own selfish desires , and the world around me became
more important, than my time with God, the less I prayed, the more I strayed, and God
became someone I turned to in times of trouble rather than staying his friend.
I got older, had children, failed relationships, and trying to get my life with God back on track,
on again off again.
It wasn't that he was far away, it was me.
My prayers weren't as powerful as I remembered, my heart a little more hardened , and my ears not
so sensative to the Holy Spirit.
I found myself longing to be young again, back when we were so close that He was all I thought about.
It hasn't been easy.. and not because God isn't doing his part..
It has been me, not forgiving myself.  It has been a process.
I find it sooo easy to forgive everyone. I can't even stay mad at anyone for more than 30 minutes.
At myself however , well, I just kept beating myself up.

I feel like I have started over with God, and now I'm learning even more than as I did as a child,
and slowly He is building up that faith that I once had.
Just like exercise for your body, if you do not keep yourself in the word, and take time out for the Lord,
your spirit get's weak, drained, and you aren't running at your full potential.
We have to work out our Spirit just as we do for our natural body.
Sometimes it will hurt when we are being challenged with something new, but it's for our good.
Just as my leg cramps hurt, but in the long run, (or short jog hahaha) it will be good for me.
So I'll keep goin one step , and one day at a time.

I'm so excited about this new walk with Lord.  Not that we ever stopped walking completely, but now
I'm after him... and I won't stop till I see his face.
My dream has always been to dance in his arms when I finally get to see him.. and I wanna do some moves that I had better be in shape for! I can't have my savior bending me back in a dip only to have my hip go out!

Looking forward to the dance.... here and in Heaven...
Kim

Relax... Go fishin!

He did it again! God shows up, just when I'm ready to give in, or better yet,
just when I decide I guess I should try to come up with my own solution.

Finances... ugghhhh... their no fun. 

As some of you may know, we have our own photography studio.
We are just now 2 years into it as a full-time job for myself.
First year, God gave us the go-ahead, and he blessed us with
over 25 weddings! That's not including our family photo sessions,
and some senior photos.
Then the economy collapsed, but it didn't seem to hit us yet.
God has it, he's in control.
He does have it, but we have gone lower in our finances than we
have ever been, so much so that we've had to get help with food,
and not drive the car so we can conserve gas.
Only 6 weddings this year so far, and a few photo sessions.
Yet our needs every month are met, we tithed , and even sowed
offerings, and still we were not seeing the overflow that we KNOW
God can give. 
So what's goin on?? 
This lead us into a place we had not been since we got married.
It has lead us to seeking God, with all we have,  and He is teaching us
refining us, and sometimes it hurts, but we are welcoming it, because
we know that we know God will bring us through!

Someone sent me something yesterday that said,

When life is hard and payday is still so far away and when the salary comes


it's not enough, there is only one thing to do; God says the struggle is over


for you..
 
I had to let that simmer in my mind for a minute..
When we do all we can do on our part, then the rest of the battle is up to God.
So don't stress out, it will come.
Today in HEB after our walk , we ran into a friend and to our surprise he is
also facing the same financial problems, and he was talking about how
God has been coming through every month with just enough for him to make it.
Then he said,  this economy is not ours, when you pay what you can, go fishin
and let God take over. 
WOW!  A double message, and we've been getting those a lot lately!
Just God confirming himself to us to rest in Him.
 
So , when things get tight, and you are doing all God has set out for you to do,
remember the rest of it is in HIS hands, and in HIS timing (He likes to do things when
it can only have happened if He did it)... remember to rest in His peace, his Love,
and hang on to the promises of God while you are waiting for your answer to come
through.
 
 
Lord,
Be patient with me as I learn to let go, and give you full control.
Surround me with your peace.  Open my eyes and let me see
what it is that I may have to learn through this, about you, about myself,
about others.  Help me see through your eyes.
You oh Lord are faithful.  I put my trust in you.
In Jesus Name - Amen
 
James 1  is a great read when facing trials , and your faith is being tested.
I am choosing (because it's not natural in the flesh) to be joyful about
this time of endurance.  Seeking out what God is doing.
I can not wait till I can post on here the out come of this time in our lives.
Rick and I both are taking our walk with the Lord to a new level.
 
You're in our prayers.
I'm goin swimming this weekend... ( I don't fish)

Desire

I just wrote on Facebook how I wanted the Lord to cause more rain than the forcasted percentage.
As I did, I apologised to the campers who are going out this weekend, and I told them, " I love you , but I desire rain.
Then it had me thinking. Desire. Love. The two are so close.
When you love so deeply that you crave, and long for that someone, or something you begin to
have a desire for them/it.
Remember the first love you have, that new romance, you so strongly desire to be near, to hear from,
to see, to feel that person? For thos of you who are born again, remember that first love, that hunger, that desire, you could not get enough of Jesus, and that wonderful new feeling of being set free?

These are the last days. I am finding that I am desiring the Lord, His Holy Spirit, His Will, My Father,
I want all of him, I don't want to lack anything, I am finding a new desire for Him that once was faded.
With life getting in the way , and Jesus get's what's left.
I don't want that anymore. I'm hungry for more! This last week, I made a choice to run after Him.

My chanllenge for you is this... if the love is faded by the curtain of life.. pull it back, go seek Him,
spend time with Him everytime you can.
He loves you. He has so much for you. He knows you better than you know yourself.
If you don't know Him, but think you might like to, if your tired of the life you lead day in and day out,
if the hurts in life are just more than you bear right now, call on Him, he's just a breath away.
The Bible says Who so ever believes in Him shall be saved.
Do you believe He is the son of God? That he died for your sins?
Maybe you aren't sure, but you want to believe,
God knows your heart. 
Jesus come into my Heart, forgive me of my sins, be Lord over my life.
Give me a fresh start, heal my wounds, heal all the hurt, and trauma from
the time I was a kid to now, make me new.
In Jesus Name- AMEN!!

If you've prayed that prayer it's time to tell someone!
The Bible says Confess me before men, and I will confess you before my Father.
Soo, tell someone!
Then, I want you to get involved in a church that proclaims Jesus is Lord!
Need help finding a church? I would be glad to help.

Father,
I ask for anyone reading this that you fill them with a burning desire to know you more.
I pray for the hurts in their life, the struggles they face, that you will lift their burdens.
Heal their hearts. Set them free.
In Jesus Name! Amen

Goodnight all!

To run or not to run

Well, today was my 2nd day to go walking with Rick.   We go to a local park and it's really beautiful at 7 in the morning.
We started off up the hill to the trail. At the entrance of the walking path, Rick decided he wanted the camera from the car, and told me to go ahead.
So, I took off up the hill. It has three levels that kick my butt at first (only because I'm so out of shape!), so I got to the top and there was the sun just peeking up over the tree tops , and the tall grassy weeds were glistening with dew.. and then I saw the most amazing sight! 5 bucks leaping through that beautiful scenery! WHERE's RICK??????  Don't you know it, just when you need the camera.. lol. 
Rick was sad he missed it, but went off trail in hopes to find something to shoot (with the camera).

I went on with my walk, and sang to the Lord, and then got a nudge to run... so off I went.. (probably more like galloping) it felt great.... the breeze on my face.. and 1000 feet later ... I walked.. I know, I know.. not a far run, but for me, it was great!  I did this off and on through out my walk.
Suddenly while running down the last downhill slope I felt a pinch in my hip. 
OK OK.. time to walk.

I felt GREAT when I got home!  Now that I've been at my computer for a few hours editing photos, I got up, only to discover that I now walk with a limp.
Hmmm maybe it was the devil who nudged me to run.. nahhh...
He would never tell me to do something that was good for me, even it might cause some pain.
Sometimes we tell ourselves to do things that are good for us that might cause ourselves pain like jogging, and
sometimes God will tell us to do things that are good for us that might caue us pain. (at first)
Like:
It hurts our pride to forgive when we feel the person doesn't deserve it.
It hurts to give money you worked so hard for, and may not have it to give.
It hurts to love some people when you feel like banning them from your life.
It hurts to give up something you are addicted to.
It hurts to be understanding when you really want to tell them to quit being a baby.
It hurts to do something nice for someone you don't like too much.

There are many others... but my point is.. yes, it may hurt, but after you
keep practicing it doesn't hurt anymore, it becomes habit, and it's going to
benifit you each time you do it.
Before long, you will be looking for the chance to do things , or feel things you once
thought you would never do , or feel.

So I encourage you today to take that extra step, go the distance, and let God take
you to a new level.  Take that thing He's been trying to get you to do, or not do, and
go for it!  He wants to take you to a new level!